This week's theme is permission and when ponder permission I can't help but see how trust and permission are deeply connected. I am realizing that to give ourselves the permission we seek externally we must first learn how to trust ourselves. Trusting ourselves is a lost virtue these days as social media is in our face everyday with other people, doing other amazing things that make us question what we are doing, and what our worth is. I always like to say to myself "Be inspired, but trust yourself." If I get too into inspiration mode, it's all I do, and the sight of my true, authentic self gets further and further away.
I believe we all hold the message we most deeply crave within us. I believe giving ourself permission, and trusting in this message is one of the highest forms of fulfillment. Inspiration can only go so far, and I have found that when i'm the most inspired, it's usually because somebody is speaking a language, or message as if it's my own. One that is so near and dear to my own inner most feelings, that the words could almost be my own. And then I ask, "well, why aren't they?" And it's usually because of lack of trust, and lack of permission to speak those words, or BE that person.
How often do you read or hear something that YOU have thought or felt but never shared with anyone because you weren't sure if it was "right?" Oh my gosh, this is literally the story of my life. I've been waiting my whole life for other people to validate my own authentic thoughts. This year i've finally began giving myself permission to feel and be the way I do. Without external permission (validation.) And it feels amazing. It has literally been the most unfulfilling experience to have to wait to hear someone that I'm inspired by to speak the words that I've felt forever just to give myself the permission to feel them. All because I didn't trust myself, for if I did, I would grant myself the permission to feel what I feel, right or wrong. And in turn, the people who most inspire me are the one's who are deeply trusting in themselves.
I believe the most empowering, and even attractive thing is radical trust in oneself. The strength to give ourselves the time, space and opportunity to truly listen to our own truth, to get to know our intuition, and to hear our heart speak is so powerful. What more could we really ask for from people? Imagine a world where we all believed in ourselves, trusted and followed our heart, walked in deep integrity and authenticity of our purest possible truth?! Why isn't this cultivated from a young age and why have we gotten so far away from this way of being? And why are people so afraid to trust in themselves; constantly looking for someone, or something to show them the way.. a way that can never truly be found anywhere outside of ourselves? Are we afraid of the responsibility that comes with owning ourselves so deeply, are we afraid of rejection, of being wrong or judged? Why is it that we are afraid to own our true power..instead..handing it off to someone or something else? Could it be because we don't want to take the blame if we "fail?" Could it be we don't believe we have anything worth listening to inside of ourselves? Or maybe there are people who truly do not believe there is any wisdom to be accessed inside of themselves at all.
You are worthy. We are all worthy. Trusting ourself, and giving ourself permission takes practice. One thing I've been doing lately is whenever I feel like I'm seeking permission(validation) outwardly, I just stop and allow myself to feel and think exactly what i'm feeing and thinking. This has helped me to surrender into the truth of myself and therefore offering me permission to feel what I feel, ect. Try it!
Also, while writing this, I've realized that a big part of permission is validation. This will be my next entry, look for it tomorrow or Friday!